Motherhood Management

This Mothers Day as I sat down and reflected, I realized yet again that the 9-10 year olds are much more 

mature these days. They are pretty independent individuals and thus require a different level of 

parenting than their previous generation. Maybe this changes in each generation or maybe this has 

changed more in recent years with the technological advancements being exponential. This made me 

realize that motherhood of a nearly preteen has its similarities to leading a semi experienced team.

While we are their primary carers and the love of parents transcends all bonds, here I talk primarily in 

terms of their education and extra curricular responsibilities and how they require a nurturing and 

motivational environment for their growth just like our team members. Here’s how:

1. They both need their own space and some time to think and try things on their own. 

2. Micromanagement doesn’t help.

3. They need a little direction to utilize their strengths to the best possible way and take up the

right opportunities. This could be in the choice of subjects or right projects.

4. In case of mistakes, they need a little patience and understanding and some kind of disaster 

management. Later on a discussion on how to avoid them in the future. Mostly they already 

take ownership and definitely don’t need blame games.

5. Timelines are helpful as are goal settings.

6. The clearer the communication regarding timelines and goals, the better. The more well 

defined, the better.

7. Brainstorming together is helpful in case of a new challenge. 

8. Having a routine helps. Be it school or fixed weekly and daily meetings.

9. Some autonomy is helpful. As is some togetherness. 

10. Sometimes it’s good to have fun together.

Leadership has no age

Recently our 9 year old son was chosen to be the School Marshal at his school. It was an extra proud moment to witness the Investiture ceremony from the front row seats reserved in his name and see the young ones taking their oaths so solemnly. Within days, I saw a change in his sense of responsibility be it in punctuality or managing the class. When he was recommended for his leadership skills in his report card, I was happy but surprised. What leadership skills could such young ones home? But then right through the application process till date, I have witnessed leadership at student level. From the way he carries himself, helps fellow students and teachers at his own initiative to the shine in his shoe which he ensures. The school plans to have leadership camps to help hone these skills further. Looking forward to this new journey for the young one. It has proven to me that that there is no age to learn but also no age for leadership.

Midlife Crisis

Recently I felt kind of goalless, in every direction and a bit empty. I realized I looked for happiness within those close to me and those aspects where we intersected but not in myself. After a bit of analysis, I realized that these were symptoms of mid-life crisis. 

The old goals stopped making sense and looking there did not lead to happiness. I needed to look for new reasons to find my bliss. It wasn't about major changes but about taking care of myself in everyday life. Sometimes grief of losing a family member affects even more with time. It grows heavier when you realize you need to keep carrying forever. So one needs to unload, take a break and redistribute it so that it is bearable. This redistribution requires one to look for new reasons to smile. Some of us may start a new book, a new series, a new hobby, walks, visiting new places, talking to old friends.  Or just curl up in your shell till you realize what you need. Changing an aspect of routine. Changing your style. Slowly redefining yourself. It is different for everyone. It may not happen at once. Each one of us will have our own pace as we move beyond it to the next phase.

LOTR vs Harry Potter

Recently I saw the LOTR series and revisited the Harry Potter series. I was yet again drawn to the similarities between the two and differences and ommissions from book.

The differences and similarities of different stories to the book with require its own series of blog posts, will do that some other time.

For now, I will focus on the similarities between the two series:

1. Friendship plays an important role: be it Frodo and Samwise or Harry, Ron and Hermoine. 

2. Or even Merry and Pip vs Fred and George. These two even seem similar in chatacters: pranksters yet loyal and important.

3. Nightriders and Dementors: they are creatures which are neither dead or alive and suck all joy and bring out a coldness. They can make a person worse tgan dead.

4. Gandalf vs Dumbledore. The wizened powerful wizards  who are mentors to protagonists even look so similar.

5. Sauron vs Voldemort: both are dark wizards gone wrong who don't have their own form and fullpower and are trying to regain it. Both are severely feared and manipulative. Both are too powerful even in their formless form.

6. The ring vs the locket horcrux: it changes the nature of the person. It sucks the power out of the person and tries to take control over the person. 

7. Protagonists need to destroy the  sources of power of these dark wizards and embark tough journeys for the same.

8. Gollum vs Kreacher: similar looking elves.

The two classics are very different of course but have sufficient similarities to feel that maybe the origins of Harry Potter started with LOTR. 

The fault in our stars and others and their side effects

Some books demand to be read just as "pain demands to be felt". This is one such book. The first time I read it, I  loved it. I felt it was a masterpiece. It started on this genre of youngadult bools. Especially medical ones. I hunted them for years and devored them. Some such ones:

1.  The fault in our stars ( we already know this but it has to be included in the list)

2. Five feet apart, 

3. Everything Everything, 

4. All the bright places, 

5.The Sun is also a star

6. Midnight Sun.

7.Eleanor and Park

8. The girl with the nine wigs.

The last one is bit different because it is true. It is a memoir. So special. 

But to me they are also special. All characters come alive.

But "The fault is our stars" the most. It makes you emphathise. 

Before reading the next time, I watched the movie and loved it utterly. I loved how true it was to the book and how beautifully it portrayed the characters.

The next time I read the books years later, it felt being hit by a speeding train. I was stunned by the force of it. I read the book. I highlighted quotes. I watched the movie again. And for a final touch. I read " The Imperial Affliction." The version which I liked the most. Maybe not most accurate one but the fun one.

Can a book have such hold on you? Even after reading so many books, it is a rare experience. But yes, sometimes a book demands that you just stop everything and think about it. It can even literally put you in bed or (pull you put of it) for a while.

I remember experiencing it the first time I read Harry Potter (part1 and then againin part 5 and 6).

This is not the same feeling as not knowing what to read next ( which is a milder side effect). This is not even an overwhelming sense of loss of the characters or of finishing an awesome book. That happens. This is when somehow the characters pull you within and after it is over, you need to pay homage to them as you contonue to feel a bit bewildered while returning to the living world.

The diary of Anne Frank: a review

This is a classic book which everyone should read. As a child I read the abridged version but this complete was very different. In the years, my perspective also changed for this book. The abridged version seemed more about the way Anne and how her family managed their life and food rations within an enclosed space and also an emerging friendship between Anne and Peter which the family found amusing. I loved it. I also loved this version but for very different reasons.  This version is more about a teenage girl coming to age and how she deals with internal and external changes. I see similarities between the families hiding in enclosure and  initial covid days. Of course minus the discrimination. One relates to the way Anne craves for fresh air, going out, for company and then also for solitude. It goes on to show Anne growing over a period of time. It shows her as a typical teenager struggling with her parents, the generation gap, initial attraction, exploring the unknown and discovering her sensuality. Would not recommend this complete version for kids below 12.

It may seem darker to them. But would highly recommend it for mid teenagers and above and their parents.  It goes on to show her maturing and changing her perspective over the years.  Loved it for its complete complexities and slight darker edge though. This is a book worth absorbing.

Life comes a full circle

Life seems to have come a full circle these days, right back from my childhood times. That time I was a child, now my son is. I am reminded vividly of those times, especially visits to my Naani's place. It was the best place in world to me then. I am still reminded of sitting on her lap and eating the gol boti (mutton) while she regaled tales from her childhood. Those times remind me strangely of today's scenario and the way life has come back the full circle, though weirdly. Then, the house and neighbourhood itself was very safe where literally everyone knew everyone so no doors were ever locked. It was safe for children to play outside. Today also, within societies it is safe for children to play outside their homes, though noone knows each other. That time, my naani used to call out from her terrace or call up shop keepers whenever she would fancy a kulfi or jalebi. Being the friendly neighbouhood, anything under the sun was available to her at a moments notice. She knew not just the first name but the latest details of all shopkeepers and their families. Today again, we have the shopping world in our fingers tips through different "instamarts". A press of a finger and we receive the order within 15 minutes from milk to gourmet cheesecake. But we care the least to know which shop it was sourced from, let alone the delivery boy's name.

Strange coincidences across the generations. The world grew smaller as we grew apart. 

Somethings that did not change. The love. The people. I lost my naani around similar age as my son lost his nana (my dad). They each dotted their grandchildren similarly and played a significant role in their lives and even fed them similarly. The affection and memories remain. The outer world changed its way of communicating but the hearts that are connected communicate similarly.

Maybe the future will again complete a full circle where we will again know the first names of those around us and call out instead of whatsapping or pinging.

The booklist

A recent book I read had a booklist which people started following. It was strewn all over in different places and reached different people in different walks in their and across generations. It inspired me to create my own list. If I had to create a list of my own which I would want to recommend to just anyone, it would be the one below. This has something for everyone: classics, humour, traditional, modern, positivity, darker, thriller, young adult, alightly philosopical/ words of wisdom kind of books. Together the list is balanced and covers different aspects of life and a plethora of emotions and incidently contains all my favourites. It was hard to restrict myself to so few. I wanted a list of 10 but could stop only after this 18. I hope this list also reaches someone in need to reading a good book or who wants to start reading.

1. Little Women

2. Heidi

3. The secret garden

4. Polyanna

5. A little princess

6. The book thief

7. Just as long as we are together: Judy blume

8. Anne of Avonlea

9. Speedpost

10 And then there were none

11. Coma

12. The fault in out stars/five feet apart

13. The Brethen

14. The undomesticated goddess

15. Who moved my cheese

16. Tuesday with Morrie/The last lecture

17. Chicken soup for the teanage soul

18. Mallory towers/ any one Enid Blyton book

I miss my dad

I miss/missed my papaji,

When I awake up in the morning

When the city opened up

When corona cases decreased

When corona cases increased

When we drink tea

When I got a cold

When I wanted chocolates

When I was awarded at office

When something went wrong in office

When Diwali was impending

When it was Diwali

When the last year with him ended

When the new year when I would never see him started

When Lohri was impending

When it was Janamashtmi

When I just wanted to talk

When the workday ended

When Lata Mangeshwar passed away

When Shane Warne passed away

When the war started

When it was my late grandparents' birthday

When the little one did well

When the little one looked like him

When I look in my mum's eyes

When my husband remembers him

When we eat fruit

When we talk to family

When anyone loses anyone close

When I see some parent with their child even on TV

When I read or look at my bookshelf

When I dream of him

When I remember the dreaded day

When my heart palpitates

When I am confused

When I need advice

When I sit in the on the couch where I would talk to him

When I am on the road

When I walk

When I listen to old songs

When I think of his or my impending birthdays

When something good happens

When something bad happens

When I look in the mirror

I miss him, everyday.

The normal stuff

A new year does deserve a new post. But I have been in a writer's block for a while now so just going to go with the flow. This is not my first post of the year. But this did start as that. 

This time the New Year did not bring about the same joy so it was difficult write a post of a new start. Sometimes we don't want to let go of what is getting left behind with the past.

Sometimes new beginnings are not about wanting everything to be different and new and stretching oneself. Sometimes it's just a booster to continue to the next right step. Sometimes that's all that we can do. And it's enough.

As I often mention, normalcy is underrated. There is great value in our routine. A normal family evening or weekend. We just need to realize that.  The power of salt over the overrated spices. The power of comfort food over highly acclaimed dishes. A walk in the sunlight. The feel of the morning wintery air. A parents' care. A loved one's touch. The softness and trust of a child. The belogingness to a set of people or a firm. A reassuring snore. A much used blanket. 

 So this year, lets cherish some of that underrated yet so precious normal stuff.

Grief by Gwen Flowers

Grief doesn't go away. It just dims enough for you to continue daily stuff and then pops up to remind you that it never left you. It is there not just in all the big moments but also in missing small daily conversations, some shared word, a sweet memory or just the onset of a morn. To me, it brings about a feeling of being unteethered. The loss of a validation of all I do. The direction of life. The constant refrain of a question that now can life ever get better or is apex lost with the person.

This poem by Gwen Flowers brings out this do clearly so am jotting it down here.

Grief

I had my own notion of grief.

I thought it was the sad time

That followed the death of someone you love.

And you had to push through it

To get to the other side.

But I’m learning there is no other side.

There is no pushing through.

But rather,

There is absorption.

Adjustment.

Acceptance.

And grief is not something you complete

But rather, you endure.

Grief is not a task to finish

And move on,

But an element of yourself –

An alteration of your being.

A new way of seeing.

A new dimension of self.

by Gwen Flowers

Papaji's homeopathy gyan

My grandfather had studied homoepathy. We followed his medicines. Then my dad carried on rhe legacy. For 90% of ailments, he had those drops which he would put in a swig of water and make me take. And I would be ok again. He was my family doctor. Recently he would often repeat the most commonly used medicines and ask me note them. I didn't. And now I do in my attempt to continue the legacy.  These are just some basic medicines in case of minor ailments but very effective

1. R1: sore throat, swelling of throat or other swellings. 10-12 drops every 15minutes.

2.R6: flu like symptoms. 10-12 drops every 15minutes. Can be alternated with R1.

3. Kali Phosphoricum: Anxiety and stress. 4 tablets thrice a day

4. Influenzinum: prevention of flu. 2 drops directly on the tongue every day for 5 days and then every week. Or 10 drops in water.

5. Hephur sulph: cold like symptoms

6. Aconite: sudden flu like symptoms , also anxiety

7. Selenium: for gaining strength. 7-8 or less drops thrice a day or less.

8. Alleraid: sinus. 1 tablet thrice a day

9.Carbo vegetalis: oxygen. 2-3 drops thrice a day, also gatric discomfort.

10. Verat alb: low BP, vommitting

11. Arsenic alb: burning in stomach

12. R55: Injuries, broken bones. Only thrice a day. 10 drops? 

13. Pulsatilla Nigricans: loss of smell. 10 drops in water thrice a day

14. Kali bichrome: Stomach fullness, gas, sinus, ear ache. 4 drops in water thrice a day.

Where she went: quotes

"Where she went" is a sequel of "If I stay". It has some really good words and defines closure and moving along with grief so well. Not moving on but living on. If the first book was about an internal struggle stay, this is a roadmap on how she stays. The good, bad and the ugly which is what makes it realistic.

"Needle and thread, flesh and bone

Spit and sinew, heartbreak is home,

Your suture lined sparkle like diamonds,

Bright stars to light my confinement,"

For the first few weeks, I'd wake up in a fog of disbelief. That didn't really happen, did it? Then I'd doubled over. Fist to gut.  It took a few to sink in. 

Accepting other people's generosity was itself was an act of generosity that might help people in the community feel better.

Good intentions can wind up putting us in boxes as confining as coffins.

That's the thing you never expect about grieving, what a competition it is. 

I loved those pictures. They always cut off half a head or were obscured by someone's finger, but they seemed to capture something true.

I think I'm kind of getting the concept of closure. It's no big dramatic before-after. It's more like that melancholy feeling you get at the end of a really good vacation. Something apecial is ending and you're sad but you can't be that sad because hey, it was good while it lasted and there'll be other vacations, other good times.

Concert doesn't mean standing up like a target in front  of thousands of strangers. It means coming together. It means harmony.

"The clothes are packed off to Goodwill
I said my good-byes up on the hill
The house is empty, the furniture sold
Soon your smell will decay to mold
Don't know why I bother calling, ain't nobody answering
Don't know why I bother singing, ain't nobody listening"
"Disconnect"
Collateral Damage, Track 10

Someone wake me when it’s over
When the evening silence softens golden
Just lay me on a bed of clover
Oh, I need help with this burden

First you inspect me
Then you dissect me
Then you reject me
I wait for the day
That you’ll resurrect me

If I stay by Gayle Forman

A very different but interesting read. It about how someone copes when they lose it all...all that they could call their life with interesting out-of-body experience details thrown in. It brings out hope and the intrinsic fighting strength of humans.

The following are some interesting quotes from this book. They are keepers!

"How do you get over jitters? 

You don't. You just work through it. You just hang in there."

"The people who would normally pass along pertinent information that something has happened to me are in no position to do that."

"People believe what they want to believe"

"This is the first time someone has acknowledged what I have lost...the permission he just offered me -it feels like a gift."

"Sometimes you make choices in life and sometimed choices make you."

"Seventeen is an inconvenient time to be in love. All relationships are tough. Just like with music, sometimed you have harmony and other times you have cacophony."

"Losing me will hurt. It will be the kind of pain that won't feel real at first and when it does it will take her breath away. But she'll deal. She'll move on. And I bet she'll be a stronger person because of what she's lost today. I have a feeling that once you live through something like this, you become a little bit invincible."

"Maybe if I'd had more devastation in my life, I would be more prepared to ho on."

"It makes me happy to imagine them drinking tea or going to the movies together, still connected to each other by thr invisible chain of a family that no longer exists."

"But I'm also feeling all that I have in my life, which includes what I have lost, as well as the great unknown of what life might still bring me."

 

" transcendent grieving  doesn't last. Gloom descends, the awfulness of your loss hits you again and again. Real life gets on with itself. And eventually your loss normalizes, it integrates into part of your everyday life, and you find yourself 3 or 5 years later doing OK, changed but ... but still able to hear your friends' voices, still telling stories about them, still thinking of them every day. "

" In a way, they have never left me

 And that's just it, isn't it? That's how we manage to survuve loss. Because love never dies; it never goes away; it never fades. As long as you hang onto it"

Before Green Gables

This is a book which depicts Anne Shirley's life before she was at Green Gables. It flows seamlessly to the next book. Even with the change in authors, it seems a very realistic versionof Anne's past. It depicts Anne's passion, romanticism and her hardships. 

It adequately describes the characters mentioned in Anne's early life including her imaginary friends. It also narrates a brief about Anne's parents' life and death. It displays physical and other resemblences with her parents. Like her perfect nose and hatred for geometry. It also goes on to show Anne's struggle to bring up kids while still being a kid. 

It also portrays very beautifully, the origination of Anne's love for long fangled words and how she starts to read which is very endearing. It makes one understand her love for education. Though it does contradict with the way Anne goes into a self imposed school exile over a little provocation in the next book. This Anne is longing to go to school desparately. But overall it's a book which made me want to yet again revisit my favourite series from this refreshed perspective.

" I want to stay exactly where I am, looking at my beloved muddy river ambling along, and waiting for the return of Walter. I want things to stay exactly the same for ever."

"Your anger has to go somewhere. Some people get waful stomach ache and headaches"

"Anne was going to be able to stand up to whatever life threw at her. She would Prevail."

"I feel so bad about being so deep in the pit of despair just because I couldn't go to school. I didn't know that the only important thing in the whole world was that my Noah, your Noah - was alive and well. "

"Anne, thank you for showing me again that words are important. Also that teaching is fun. And that forgiving is possible."

"Go.If you stay here because of  Anne,  you'll be hating her in a few years"

"She longed to tell the history of her own. But how she could do that when there was no one to tell it to?"

Imagining things is not wicked. It's good. It's what makes  people write books and paint pictures and make music. It means pretending things. Go on doing that...It can often rescue you from the depths of sadness"

"But getting angry makes me almost more upset  than the thing that makes me angry."

"It wasn't perfect but Anne should surely have learned by now that life had a lot  of cracks on its surface. Everything would be fine."

"What do you suppose I was before that happened? Was I really nothing? What are you when you're not? That?'s even harder to figure out than what you are after you die"

"I learned to read today. That's why it was just the most important day of my life, except for the morning I was born. Today, I felt like I got born all over again"

"Listen carefully. It will get better. Probably not today. Maybe not tomorrow or next week. Or even next month...But it will get better"

"But you, you often get the right answer even when all the numbers seem to be all wrong"

I don't feel so good about standing up myself. I'd like someone to be helping me. Yes, I'll help you. But someyime I hope I get a chance to be young before I get too old to enjoy it'.

I just can't  understand why it's necessary for people to die. When they go, they leave such a chasm of emptiness behind  them. I thought I'd fallen into the pit of despair before, but nothing was ever quite like this" 

" She wanted to put them all in a large nox and keep them in some sort of memory place where she could take them out and look at them as often as she wanted. But right now, she wanted to put a lid on that box and keep in securely locked for a little while. She needed a look ahead rather than behind."

"She had lived long enough to know that floors didn't become like that (shiny) on their own."

"...captivated by the limitless expanse of sea,..., the smell of salt and seaweed. This is what I've been waiting for my whole life"

"Even a crying baby delighted her because she knew she didn't have to carry it, comfort it, or feed it."

" she felt as though she's absorbed enough happiness to keep her warm and safe and satisfied for the rest of her life."

The last cup of tea

What won't I do for another cup of tea, with you Daddy,

We know the first, we know the inbetweens but we don't know, we never know the last,

The last cup of our tea together,

It passes away, it rushed away with life and its strife,

How I long for another cup of your tea and favourite bread,

With conversation that would bring peace, make the hear glad,

Not having that for the rest of my life fills the heart with dread,

We know the first, we know the inbetweens but we don't know the last

The last cup of tea and favourite bread

Oh how I miss you my wonderful dad!

Grieving

When you lose a parent it's almost like a physical loss of a part of yourself. The grief is there to stay though it will hit harder in the beginning then the frequency may taper to more bearable hours and that may be days much later on. That later on varies for everyone. Here's my take on the grief:

1. The first few days you feel a huge loss of even physical strength that it's tough to even get up.

2. Being alone can be very tough in the beginning. Even a few moments.

3. Walls can seem to close in.

4. You may have huge bouts of crying and it seems unstoppable. Days and days this can continue.

5. Or can't seem to cry at all for a while

6. The same last scene can keep recurring in your mind

7. And then one day it goes out such that you can't see it again at all.

8. You may dream of the lost loved ones a lot

9. Or can't seem to meet them even in dreams.

10. You may have palpitations or other stress related physical symptoms

11. You may want to be busy all the time

12. Or not at all want to be too busy

13. Or there are times when you can't do anything

14. Tears can fill your eyes suddenly when not expected

15. You may cling to old albums

16. You may find each new thing a huge ordeal, not to be able share with those loved ones. So that entire first year is going to be extra hard.

17. You may get a little better and then slip back again remembering any little moment.

18. You may want to talk a lot and build up a huge support system

19. Or may want to withdraw much more or with specific people

20. Random moments will remind of your lost loved one and how your life changed

21. Even seeing that relation, for example, parents with  their kids in a random place or even on the TV can tear you up

22. You may keep getting hit by the realization again and again each time you wake up initially. You wish it was a bad dream. But it doesn't go away. And then with time the frequency changes a but. Instead of many times a day, maybe the realization hits you just once or a few times every day. 

23. You may eventually turn spiritual or  perplexed by questions of life and death

24. A particular time in the day may be much harder for you for the void will remain.

25. Sleep patterns may change

26. So can food habits

27. The same physical space may seem very confining suddenly

28. Yet, you may be wary of any variability in the routine or that same physical space.

29. You may take a shaky step ahead and fall back two steps.

30. And it feels like a huge abyss.

Then, just hold onto yourself. Hold onto anything that gives a bit of peace to you. One small step to the next. It happens. It is toughest part of life, at least so far. It will take time. But one day it will be more bearable, you will be better. Though you will miss but slowly you will take good memories in your heart and remember that horrible moment when you lost your loved one, less. The realization will set in. But it will never be the same again. It will change you iŕrevocably in many ways. It will age you irreversably. The pain may go to the background for a while but it can pop up anytime. You will learn to live with that much pain and sense of loss. But you will be functional and will live life fully again someday. And it will feel wrong also at times. But remember it is not. Because your life is linked to other loved ones also who are there. Because life is too precious to be frittered away. It needs to be lived every single day. 

List of movies to watch

So far, I have created a list of some great feel good movies and now this lust contains some good movies to watch ahead which may then get into the next lists. These a good mix of movies whose story I know as have read the book and those which I need to see. So here it is: 

1. 5 feet apart

2. Little women

3. Anne of green gables (cartoon)

4. Anne of green gables (CBC series)

5. Anne of green gables (1985 movie)

6. Anne of green gables (2016/17 movie)

7. The fault in our stars (again)

8. The secret garden: cartoon

9. The secret garden: movie

10. Heidi : cartoon/movie

11. Casper( cartoon, again)

12. Polyanna :cartoon

13. Polyanna : movie

14. Confession of a Shopaholic (again)

15. Percy Jackson series of movies

16. Big little lies (maybe)

17. Through the looking glass

18. Sleepless in seattle

19. Sound of music

20.It's a wonderful life

21. Inception

22. Matrix trilogy

23. LOTR

24. Vampire diaries: series, try

25. Parasite

26. Casablanca

27. Farewell (Chinese)

28. Life is beautiful

29. Dead Poets Society

30. Legally Blonde

31. The Dark Night

32. Eternal sunshine of spotless mind

33. Breakfast Club

34. Forest Gump

35. Four weddings and a funeral

36. Gravity

37. Interstellar

38. Matilda

39. Famous five series BBC

40. Nancy drew series

41. Sweet Valley  series/movie

42. Flintstones (again)

43. I dream of jeanie (again)

44. Hyacinth videos (more)

45. Everything everything

46. Midnight Sun

47. Sisterhood of travelling pants (again)

48. Angels and demons (again?)

49. Da Vinci Code (again)

50. Cast away

51. The theory of everything

52. The imitation game

List of hindi movies

Some recent unique, unorthodox Hindi movies (mostly amongst newer ones):

1. Hichki

2. Dear Zindagi

3. Chak de

4. 102 not out

5. Saina

6. Panga

7. Mary Kom

8. Mardaani

9. Queen

10. Chhichhore

11.3 idiots

12. Dil Chahta hai

13. Rocket Singh

14. Pyar ka Punchnama

15. Chhalang

16. Big bull

17.Sanju

18. Lagaan

19. Helicopter Eela

20. Mission Mangal

22. Sonu de Tittu de wedding

21. Guest in London

22. English Vinglish

23.Taare Zameen Pe

24. Lunchbox

25. Munna bhai

26. Lage raho munna bhai

27. Neerja

28. Bheja fry

29. Hindi medium

30.Chillar Party

31.Badaai Ho

32.Kapoor and sons

33.Udaan

34.Padman

35.Suidhaga

36.Newton

37.Shakuntala Devi

38. Thappad

39. Lakhya

40. Rock on

41. Bhaag mikka bhaag

42. Dangal

43. Secret superstar

44. Manikarnika

 Wow! Thi proves how much Bollywood has grown in mindset recently! Now for some, simple, repeatable feel good movies:

Some older feel good movies

1. Kya Kehna

2. Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum ( just because it's my favourite)

3. Abhiman

4. Kabhie Kabhie

5. Padosan

6. Yaarana

7. Namak Halaal

8. Dil toh pagal

9. Kuch kych hota hai

10. Bunty and babli

11. Jodha Akbar

12. Hum Saath saath hain

13. Guide

14. Maine pyar kiya

15. Hadd kardi aapne

16. Diwane

17. Bol radha bol

18. Hum aapke hain kaun

19. Mohabattein

20. Hum dil de chuke Sanam

21. Dilwale dulhania le jayenge

22. Akele hum akele tum

23. Papa kehte hain

24. Raja hindustani

25. Silsila

26. Har dil jo pyar karega

27. Mujse dosti karogi

28. Soldier

29. Yeh jawaani hai diwani

30 Jab we met

31. Hum tum

32. Band baja bharat

33. Humpty sharma ki dulhania

34. Kal ho naa ho

35. Hasee toh Phasee

36. Golmal

37. Chupke chupke

38. Veer  Zara

39.Jab we met

40. Dil dhadakne do

42. Shadi ke side effects

43. Chalte chalte

44. Taal

45. Don

46. Dostana

47. Chandini

48.  Ghar ho toh aisa

49. Mr. India

50.  Love aaj kal

51. Khoobsurat

52. Aaiysha

53. Haseena maan jayegi

54. Bade miyan, chota miyan 

55. Border

56. Sir

57. Dil

58. Hum hain rahi pyar ke

59. Partner

60. Mujhse shaadi karogi

61. Dil kya kare

62. Pyar kiya to darna kya

63. Hum aapke dil mein rehta hain

64. Ki & ka

65. Aakhen

66. Bhagban

66. Salaam Namaste

67. Karna

Some movies yet to be seen

____

Wake up Sid

Life in a metro

Piku

Vicky donor

Do dooni chaar

Shubh Mangal Saavdhan

I am Kalam

Tu hai mera Sunday(?)

Kahani

Black

Bucket list

The sky is pink

Talaash

Raazi

Mughalaiazam

Zero

The intern?

Tribhanga

Badla

Aarakshan

Feel good movies list (English)

Here I am creating a list of feel good, pick-me up movies which can then be watched in times of need. So here are some movies which I feel are worth watching again (in no particular order):

1. If only

2. A walk to remember

3. Mrs. Doubtfire

4. Love actually

5. He's just not that into you

6. Two week's notice

7. You've got mail

8. The notebook

9. P.S I love you

10. The confessions of a Shopaholic

11. Bride wars

12. How to lose a guy in 10 days

13. The runaway bride

14. Twilight: all movies

15. Erin Brockovich

16. Marlie & me

17. It takes two

18. The internship

19. Lego movie

20. Father of the bride: both parts

21. The sisterhood of travelling pants

22. Malificient

23. Beauty and the beast

24. Tangled.

25. Ratatouille

26. Stuart little

27. Finding nemo, dory

28. The fault in our stars

29. The princesd diaries

30. Mouse hunt

31. Harry Potter: all parts

32. Charlie and the chocolate factory

33. Home alone

34. Baby's day out

35. I am legend

36. Kung fu Panda

37. Up

38. Bruce Almighty

39. The proposal

Some good movies but maybe not rewatch: 

1. Jaws

2. Baywatch

3. Speed

4. Jurassic Park

5. AI

6. Gravity

7. The sixth sense

8. Contagion