Monday, December 18, 2017

Mandi Trip: A trip that almost wasn't to be (Part 1)

This trip almost didn't happen. Well there's a lot in it to tell so I will divide it into parts....

The decision

I had planned it long ago for research purpose. But then that time it didn't strike me how difficult it would be to reach to such a place or how the situation might vary with time. So my health fell, again and again and with it fell my confidence. I couldn't do a 12 hour bus trip. Heck, I even hated train journeys and would take flight whereever possible. I didn't do long journeys. Never had. Flights were different. And now with bad health...a weak stomach, recovering from a bad case of viral, well it seemed impossible. And there was the extreme cold which seemed equally terrifying right then. I even feared going alone. What if one of the terrible stories of incidents with girls came true? What if the bus fell due to bad weather. Fears engulfed  where there had been none. And I couldn't cancel. I had asked for this. I felt trapped and terrified.  Terrified to refuse. Trapped into going.

Then it changed. I remembered how we should always do one thing that terrifies us. So this would be it for the year.  And then I realised I didn't have to go.  Nobody would kill me if I didn't. I was even given the choice not to go. I could easily settle back into routine and have a relaxing weekend additionally. But I would always feel I wimped out. Of course there was still the need to go not just to overcome fears but also to learn and to keep my word. To do what I took as mine to be done. But it certainly helped to have it as a choice till the very end. Now I wasn't trapped into going, now it was an internal choice.

And I was off. Off to a new journey. The thought in mind ...there's a difference between foolhardiness and courage. Often we don't which we are doing this much later. I wondered which this was. Of course for many, it would be trivial but that varies from person to person and also in different situations.

More to follow....the journey....the trip, the reflections it brought and a lot more...

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